Trial Balance

13 July 2006

Ma, mom!! Where are you? Mom, ma..!!

Eh venkat, why are you shouting? I’m here only washing your clothes in the bathroom…what to do? Even after 27 years, you still don’t wash your clothes…

Oh mom, don’t drag those now, I have happy news for you, guess what?

Did you get any new internet girl friend?

Oh god, why do you always suspect me?

Then what, all these years you go daily to surf internet at café for one hour, who knows what you do there? Slowly I’m starting to get worried about you. I pray god you don’t bring any girl in front of me in one fine morning and say you started loving her through chat and wanted to get married. Remember one thing we are from strict Brahmin family, if your father comes to know about it…

You don’t believe me ma?

I believe you but not your age my dear son…

Oh ma, I don’t chat mah, I only do blogging…

Blogging or slogging I don’t know that and all, all I know is to look after this family & prepare food for you people… I am happy as long as you don’t indulge in any wrong activity.

Oh mom, I almost forgot for what I called? Don’t change the topic. Don’t you have the curiosity to know why I was calling you so badly?

It certainly cannot be of any useful info for me, you always talk about cinema only, either it should be of any actor doing this film that film or that heroine is in love with this actor, oh god, I’m tired of this, I am more worried about your life, still you couldn’t find one good job for yourself.. When will I see you in job, when will I see you married, will I be alive to see my grand children pee at my lap…

That’s what I was about to say…

What?? You already have children or seen a girl to marry?

Oh god, give me a break, I have a got an interview call!

Anyway you are getting it every second day, but of no use, what’s new in that?

This is different ma, this is a second interview call from same company, they have now called me for final interview at their office, and I am 100% confident that this job is for me only.

Oh really? Thank god, the astrologer told that Guru is started shifting to 5th place in your horoscope, so things should brighten up… he was very right. Today itself I will go and do a pooja on guru and sani’s name… so when do you have to go?

Tomorrow itself I have to go, if I get this job, really I will be very happy ma...

Yes you are right, we can clear few of our family debt, and also we can buy few more jewellery for vasantha, she has also attained her marriage age…

No, no I won’t marry now; I would like to study for doctor…

You little devil, you are also here only, and eavesdropping is very bad…

Poda monkey, I just came finishing my tuition classes, just heard my name being cooked here, that’s why I stretched my ear a bit...

Oh god, stop fighting, I have prepared your favorite Spicy sambar and rice pappad , come and have food first…

Just wait for 5 minutes, let me go and update this news to gopal and come back soon...

Oh yes it is so important you see, I don’t know why you always go behind that gopal and update him everything, is he coming to our house anytime? All time you go behind him… gopalu gopalu…. Can’t you find any other good friend?

Stop it ma, you always find fault with my friends, I guess you don’t get sleep without criticizing me or my friends… I’ll quickly rush and come back soon… wait for me…

Oh god, somehow please get this job for my son, you have done so much of injustice to me so far, atleast open your eyes now, I beg for your mercy, bring us out of this financial mess.

14 July 2006

Eh venkat, it’s already 8, get up soon, you have to go to interview today…

Ma, please ma, 5 minutes…

Oh god, eh venkat, this doesn’t look good, have some seriousness in your life, your acts doesn’t justify even a bit of your age, get up soon, have a bath, come to pooja room and pray god to clear this interview without any problem..

8:45 AM

Please bless me ma...

Kamatchi amma, please save my son, you have to give him the right path, help him to clear this interview, I am depending on you only, wait let me put some viboothi (holy ash) …

Ma please ma, don’t put it big, people will stare at me differently…

No one will say anything, this is what going to save you, and your boss will get a good opinion about you, have faith and go…

Nothaal avalo, kannai kathaal avalo… jimka marina, eh jimka marina, eh jimka jimka marina…

Dei what song is this? chant some gayathi and go... it will help you to gain some virtue...

Ok, okay, close the door, I’m going...

Oh god, don’t say I’m going, say I’m leaving and come back later...

All the best da monkey…

Ok ok, thanks my dear little devil…

6:00 PM

Oh god, it’s very late, still no sign of venkat, I wonder what happened to him, did he succed in the interview? Or he failed? Is it the reason why he is late? Oh god, I hope he isn’t dejected by any mean.. oh god please help him, atleast he could have phoned and updated the status..

Oh he will come ma, why are you worrying, I myself getting irritated & scratching my head in solving this problem...

Already wanting to look like trisha or asin, you have spoiled your hair like anything… how good it was looking before with nice long hair, now by doing bleaching cleeching only few are left, that too will go if you scratch your head like this…

MAAA… I GOT THE JOB… MAAA… MA…!

What! Oh god, only today all my prayers were answered, I’m very happy da venkat! I should thank that kamatchi only for saving you.

Yes ma, even I was in bit of tension, it was tough actually, somehow I got the job, but I will have rotational shifts, since it’s a BPO company you see...

I know it will be touch for you initially, but I heard all major companies are going into shifts these days, even manu’s daughter who stays at the end of this street also goes in night shifts only..

Yes, yes I know, you are talking about Rekha right?

There you see, I was wondering how come you wouldn’t know details about woman…

Eh, devil, stop your nonsense, have this masala dosa got this from Vasantha bhavan while coming back...

Ok, I will take this now, but after your first month salary, I would need that green dress which asin wears in ghazini..

Ok done madam...

No, no, don’t waste money like this, we first have to clear our family debt with your salary only, so we should need to plan accordingly and keep enough savings too

Ok, ok, don’t worry mah, I won’t waste money, I will give the whole money in your hand every month okay!

All guys say the same thing before marriage!

Okay please prepare a nice coffee, I will go and update this news to gopal…

Oh god, thank you very much for hearing my prayers, you have saved me and family… eh Vasantha look after the house, I’ll visit nearby ganapthi temple and come…

Now the camera moves to somewhere in other part of the world!

"Smile an ever lasting smile, a smile can bring you near to me,
Don't ever let me find you gone 'cause that would bring a tear to me,
This world has lost its glory let's start a brand new story now my love,
You think that I don't even mean a single word I say

It's only words and words are all I have to take your heart away"

lala lala....

Can you please keep the mouth shut Catherine! I gonna listen to Eminem latest hit, you just back off Idiot!

Ma, Look at this Jack, he ain’t allowing me to sing my favourite Band!

You are a real airhead, why do u wanna complain this to mamma, this house is really an armpit, so disgusting.

Now you kids listen here, your daddy is gonna come any time now from his office, I don’t want you people to make him feel more tired okay, Just play yourself around, Only if you behave properly, I will serve you Jaffa Cakes tonight!

Oh mamma, we love you, come’on cathy let’s play in the backyard.

Ah. Darling, welcome home I was just talking about you here. Why you looking so tired!

………

Eh, what happened, I am talking to you dear!

I’m sorry, things aren’t quite right here babe, my experience today in the office was a bummer

Oh Jesus, what happened?

How can I say babe? We are all finished. Today is my last day in my office.

Whhat? What are you talking about?

Well, our directors have decided to outsource all our jobs to Asia. And they are now asking us to leave the office. So frustrating, they have decided this almost 3 months ago and it’s only now they are letting us all know.

But dear, how can they do it to you, they must have given some notice period..?

Ah, notice period, well, it’s a week’s time as specified in my appointment letter many years back, I almost noticed it only today. Now what am I going to do, who is going to give me a job, I’ am already into 40’s. We have just started thinking about savings! Our bank balance doesn’t show a good figure. Moreover, we still haven’t paid our loans, life is all miserable now dear.

Oh dear, please don’t cry, let’s think what we can do now.

What’s left, I just don’t know what to do? We just can’t see our kids suffer janet!

Don’t we have any other option?

I have thought about it, we don’t have much help from anyone now. London is too costly to live, I just don’t have any idea, what are we going to do now!

That night passed as silently as it could be…

Next day Mirror News paper had a small news info on its last page that reads like:

“Four of family commits suicide”

Staff Reporter:

London: Four members of a family committed suicide in Ascot. The police identified the dead as Bruce (44), Julie (38), Catherine (12) and Jack (10). The police believe the suicide might be due to some financial constraints. The police found out that all members consumed poisoned filled Jaffa Cakes. It’s still not clear if it is done by the consent of all the family members.

Back to Bangalore!

Ok mah, I’m leaving for office; this is my first day, so I don’t want to get late…

Ok, be careful ok!

(Poor this mother doesn’t know the work that his son going to look after at Bangalore, is the same one which is being handled by a person called Bruce somewhere in London…)

When one door of happiness closes another opens;

Yeah it closed in London and opened in Bangalore.........

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey nice one. "When one door of happiness closes another opens" i never knew this saying can also means this way. I know becos of outsourcing people are losing jobs there but i m absolutely unaware of the people commiting suicide there because of unemployment. Is it really so? Do u have facts on it, i would really lyk to know the impacts of outsourcing there. I think i should to some browsing on this topic, but nice post.

Keep writing!